Trying to make your new relationship last or just looking to avoid a repeat of your latest dating mistakes? Follow our guide to finding Mr. Right. (No, it’s not impossible!)
Dating Mistake #1: Being Too Available
We’re not suggesting you play games, but we are telling you to indulge your passions and resist the urge to abandon your social circle every time your new man sends an invitation. Take Sebastian, 34, from Chicago, for example: “When I was single, there were women I initially liked who seemed to be waiting by the phone for me to call, which let me know if I didn’t meet someone else I wanted to date, I had a standby. There just wasn’t anything to work for, and that turned me off,” he says. The more you engage in and enjoy your life, the more he’ll work to be a part of it.
Dating Mistake #2: Trying to Rehabilitate a Bad Boy
Ending a relationship is rarely easy, and though flying solo might not be your long-term goal, being on your own is better than feeling alone in a relationship with someone who treats you poorly. Even when it might be tempting to give a toxic romance one more try, knowing when to cut your losses and move on leaves you available and baggage-free when the right guy comes along.
Dating Mistake #3: Looking for Perfection
Encouraging you to settle isn’t our style, but separating your desires from your deal-breakers can give your love life a major upgrade. “There are some qualities that your mate must have—being honest, for example—and others, such as movie-star looks, that should be thrown in the would-be-nice category,” says Elizabeth R. Lombardo, Ph.D., author of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness. “Sit down and realistically figure out what characteristics are nonnegotiable and then be open-minded about the rest.”
Dating Mistake #4: Feeling Sorry for Yourself
Resist the urge to bemoan your single status (which will only make him wonder why you find yourself such terrible company) and use this time to date yourself. Taking a dance class at the local studio, hitting up the exhibit you have been aching to see and trying out the new wine bar on the corner will not only offer you the chance to have more fun but will also leave you more likely to meet someone who shares your interests. So much better than sitting in your apartment waiting for someone to “wink” at your online profile picture, isn’t it? Another bonus? You’ll have far more interesting things to talk about over dinner than what your boss made you do on your lunch break last Friday.
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