For women, emotional infidelity is far more hurtful than a partner’s dalliance with a prostitute, writes Carol Hunt
Take this scenario. It’s January 2009. Madam Hillary Rodham Clinton has just been sworn in as the 44th President of the United States of America. A day later at a press conference, her husband by her side, she explains to reporters that, shocked and hurt after the revelations about her husband’s affair with Monica Lewinsky, she embarked on numerous affairs of her own.
“I haven’t broken any laws, I don’t think I’ve violated my oath of office, I saw this as a private matter, that both of us committed acts of infidelity … we are very much in love now,” she continues, gazing adoringly at Bill. “We could have gotten divorced. We were well on our way. And if we had gotten divorced, we wouldn’t be having a press conference here today”.
With attitudes to Hillary Clinton being what they are, I think there would be an immediate call from Republicans for a public witch-burning — at the very least.
But of course — as far as we know — Hillary has always remained faithful to her Casanova husband and the words quoted above were uttered by another American politician earlier last week: the new Governor of New York, David Paterson.
Though both have admitted to infidelity, Michelle and David Paterson have presented their marriage as a celebration of unity over adversity and cleverly allowed us to approve of their sexual maturity and consequent happiness. Did they need to do this? Shouldn’t their married life be private?
Well, yes, of course it should be, but in the current American climate of hypocritical sexual prudery, they probably did the right thing. Best to present the people with their own version of events rather than have some hypocritical do-gooder (Newt Gingrich anybody?) bible-bash them out of office.
But should we feel sorry for the poor deluded Silda Wall Spitzer, who has been spectacularly humiliated. She stood by her husband’s side as he answered press questions about booking ‘dates’ with $1,000-an-hour prostitutes and she was there again, tears in her eyes, two days later when he announced his resignation as governor.
As Hillary was condemned for supporting Bill, so was Silda for literally standing by Eliot. But why is it that women are deemed pathetic and weak if they remain with men who sometimes stray?
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